The way I see him

From F1 Barbie dolls to pink and yellow rooms – I had everything a 6 year old girl could want. It would only take me one cute look and a couple of ‘pretty please’ to get my dad wrapped around all ten of my little fingers.

Mom on the other hand was the party pooper, or as dad and I liked to call her ‘The elephant butt’. Please say that you can see the OBVIOUS significance between the two. She was (and still is) the only woman who can keep me on my toes.

Even though dad never liked to result into ‘discipline’ he would teach me a lesson in his own special way. For example:
Me: Dad I want ice cream!
Dad: Not until you’ve finished your dinner.
Me: BUT I WANT ICE CREAM NOW!

*10 minutes later, a sobbing Sarah sits on the couch eating more than 15 ice creams, all brands, all flavours!*

And here’s another lesson I will never forget!
The happy Stephen family had just arrived in Germany to see an F1 race. Now the mom and the dad have already been to a few F1s, but for me, a very fashion conscious 6 year old, it was my first. Sitting pretty in the grand stands, opposite the Ferrari pit lane with Schumacher branded tees and cap, I refused to put the bright orange ear plugs in my ears. Mom went on and on about why I should put it and even resorted to threats! But dad said to me ‘You are going to learn your next lesson very soon young lady!’ And he smiled!
A few seconds into the race, my fashion sense dropped and common sense prevailed! I BEGGED with dad for the ear plugs! And I got it eventually after about 3 laps, my ears were finally protected.
Since then, every time we packed for an F1 race, I would make sure I ALWAYS packed my nice sore orange ear plugs too!

Most of the times Dad and I had special ‘father daughter’ bonds. That included me playing on his ‘computee’ or dad trying to explain a game of cricket, F1 or cycling.

Dad was always a ‘computer geek’. Something I call ‘unattractive.’ By the way, sorry to all the men on this blog who I just offended, you’re all attractive in your own special way! Back to my point, dad was always a computer geek – something I still call unattractive. Wait, I already explained that. Well the point is that he was a geek!! He was always the one to buy gadgets play with it and then toss it to mom or me!

Here’s another conversation:
Me: Dad, I think iPods are cool (Back in my day, we had iPods not Macbooks and iPads like now! Giggle! I always wanted to use mom’s back in my days dialogue!!)
Dad: Yeah … I think they are too
Me: How much does one cost?
Dad: About 600 dirhams … why?
Me: I was going to ask you if we could buy one, but I think that’s too expensive.
*45 minutes later* Dad: Lets go out to the mall
Me: OK.
*2 hours later, a happy Sarah gets into the car with a brand new iPod nano 3rd generation - which is later to be replaced by an iPhone.*

He wasn’t ‘cool’ in only my eyes – my friends thought he was amazing too! What with the blue shades and the puma shoes and the designer jeans – how can you not think that dude is cool?!
To them he was a rich guy who would be there after school, leaning against the hood of his BMW waiting for his daughter to come out but to me he was my dad, my mentor and above all my math tutor with little patience for the 12 year old who didn’t know how to find X. As a result, there were many unsolved equations, including the mystery of the flying math text books!

To me, X was only significant if you were a pirate. But to my dad – X was important for X amount of reasons. (-Ha-ha! See what I did there?)

Dad always encouraged me to learn from different cultures of the world and with that, I think I was the only girl in my class who would fly to Switzerland, Germany or Austria for the extended weekend and be back in time for the next school week.
Random father daughter bond fact: Dad and I liked to experiment: when we went to different countries. I would try the ice cream and he would try the beer and mom would sit there trying out the coffee.

Most of my hobbies have come to life because of my dad – I now have a growing passion for photography and creative writing. My taste in music is much wider than a typical fourteen year old. Instead of the normal “hip hop” and “R&B”, my ears are open to Heavy metal and Rock.

Which brings me to my next point – concerts. Listening to the kind of music dad had introduced me to had given me an ear for the band Simple Plan. Within a few short months – I had officially proclaimed them as my favorite band ever! And when Simple Plan decided to come to Dubai on the 5th of December 2008, guess who decided to put up with a screaming 11 year old? Yes, my dad.

May 30th 2006 little Rachel was born. Mom and dad had this expensive brand of Patchi chocolates for our guests. I asked my dear sedated mother if I could take a box of chocolates to school. As expected, through her sedation she screamed “NO SARAH YOU CAN’T!” Seeing that I was upset, dad secretly passed me a small box of chocolates and told me to stuff it into my bag. He said “enjoy!” It was our little secret… Until now!

I find there is no reason –whatsoever to cry over the fact that my dad is not here physically.
Instead I know better – to celebrate his life and remember all the great times we’ve had with him.

My dad was and still is my best teacher and instructor. He taught me the right things and when there was something I couldn’t do (suppose a self defense kick) he would guide me in his own special way (by telling me in tangled riddles and quotes) and help me achieve my best.

So dad, I say to you today Merci Beaucoup pour tout et je t’aime!!
French was one of the languages dad and I used to communicate, to make sure our beloved party pooper (hem hem my mother) wouldn’t understand anything we said!

Canon Warehouse Sale

Leute!
I guess this is the part where the blog begins to fall off!
It has been nice reading this blog. And getting to know a bit more about Stephen from the regulars who update this blog like Ashley and Koolest Kat (Dude, I am sure thats not your real name :))

Ofcourse Shyla is a regular here too, but we can discount her! She has no other work but to talk about her loving husband or then sulk and whine that he is not here! (Lassie I am expecting you to retaliate, bring it on!)

The updates from Stephen’s nieces have been very genuine and always touch an emotional chord.
If I am not mistaken, Shilpa is the one in the US and then moved to Canada? If I am right, then it is because he used to talk about you as well. On a few occasions, so I can say he was fond of you. Ofcourse he used to tell me about the child labor he did with his younger niece. He was fond of you both and never lost a chance to gloat about his perfect family.

Other than Lassie, I am glad to meet you all virtually!

So why am I writing today, you can ask? Its the smallest things that trigger memories. And mine has been triggered because of the Canon warehouse sale. The last time this bargain came around was in 2008. I SMSed Stephen if he wanted me to grab him anything? Would you believe the dude flew down to Germany? I thought being a CA, he would rather spend the money on camera equipment from Dubai than on tickets to Germany. He later told me his tickets were next to free becoz Lassie used to work for Emirates! That man’s style and focus was truly a cut above the rest eh?
For the past 3 years, we have had this ritual where we update our camera backpack together. And as I do so alone today, I thought I must give a tribute to the man who lived and enjoyed life to the fullest. He had the best of materialistic things and the perfect work –life balance! While it was difficult to stop envying him, I mastered the art of learning from him – so Salut mein Freund Stephen, I hope I am fortunate to meet you in the next round – wherever that might be!

To Stephen’s nieces, Ashley and Koolest Kat – have a good week and I hope to see more of Stephen through you. I know the effort it takes and please know it is appreciated.

And Lassie – you are doing good! You are doing exactly what Stephen would have wanted you to. Infact you don’t realize it – but you are pretty much doing much better than what you think!

You were always "Cool" in my eyes

I just want to start out by thanking Stephen’s friends for putting this site up. I check this blog often and I love and have thoroughly enjoyed reading each writing and learning more about my uncle who is among the angels.

Many a times I start to jot something down but somehow my hands can’t seem to type any words. Part of it is because I can’t believe that he is physically not here with us, part of it is because I am so sad that when I hugged him in January 2009, I would be hugging him for the last time & part of it because I am a little angry that things happened the way it did and my Chechi (Shyla), who I love more than anything has her heart torn into pieces.

What can I say about my dear Stephen uncle? Everyone knew him as a quiet, intelligent & unassuming person. Well, he came into my life when Chechi found “her man” and called us in Dubai to say that she might have found someone and is ready to tie the knot. I was not too keen on meeting him coz I knew that Shyla (Chechi) would have to share her love with this new person. I was twelve or thirteen when I met Stephen uncle for the first time. He was always the "cool” dude in my eyes. I think my eyes almost popped out when Stephen uncle told me that I don’t have to call him “uncle” and that I could call him Stephen. As a twelve year old, I accepted and agreed with the newly- wed Chechi that her husband was “cool”, only to be shut down by my “traditional” & “boring” older relatives who threatened to smack me if I don’t respect him and call him uncle!

Stephen Uncle had a great taste in music & movies. I loved going to their apartments on Friday afternoons coz you would find Shyla (Chechi) in the kitchen attempting to cook something or cleaning up the place. Stephen uncle would be either on his laptop on lying down on the couch reading. During summer hols, we would spend night after night playing board games like monopoly or scrabble & it was always good to be on his team (Coz, I have to admit that he always won)! Stephen uncle, in my eyes always did what he thought was right for him & his family. In the society where we lived, where almost everyone had something to say about your personal life, Stephen uncle was like a breath of fresh air. Although, I don't think he ever knew how to express his feelings. My jaws dropped when he bought my mom diamonds just because she used to cook Indian seafood delicacies for him specially once or twice a month. I still remember that day like it was yesterday where we were having brunch at a restaurant and he presented those diamonds to my mom! Needless to say, we did give him a hard time & made fun of him. :)

Part of my sadness, I have come to realize is because I wish I was close to Stephen uncle like Sharon and him was. He knew I loved him, I knew he loved me, but I wish I had taken the time to let him know that verbally. I wish I had told him how much I admired him for not following what the society says and for doing what he believed was right. I wish I had hugged him a lil tighter the last time I hugged him.

Stephen uncle, I know you are our angel, sitting up and watching down on us. Even though I never expressed it, I was very upset & angry with you & the Person, up above when you left my Chechi & your two beautiful daughters. Giving you up is definitely one of the hardest things that we as a family had to endure. Every time I think about how we laid you down to rest, I can’t help but cry. I know that you are in a better place and you will be watching down on us. I am fighting back tears as I write this but I hope you know how much I loved you and how much we miss you. Our family is never ever going to be the same without you in it. You lived your life to the fullest and did everything that your heart desired. You lived a life of legacy and we will ensure that your daughters grow up knowing how “cool” their dad was.

Your 'cool' neice

Shilpa